a cry for help

so i still dont know where i am going and pat is still in jail im sure its safe to say that this is it and i am on my own for good im so scared and i really just want to hide in a dark hole ‘im trying to have faith and im trying to not let it get me down but i cant help it im so stressed out and i miss pat so much i dont know what the reason for all this but i am trying to keep in mind that everything happens for a reason. how did all this happen how did things get like this? i feel like i am in a wonderland and it scares me its like im in a bad dream and i cant wake up im screaming begging for someone to help me but no one can hear me not even pat im alone and im lost i have no fucking idea how to be on my own or how to be an adult im so fucking lame im trying really hard i am putting everything i got into turning this around but no matter how hard i fight i cant seem to make anything happen please god if you can hear me im beggign you to help me i cant do this alone and im so stressed out that sometimes i wish i were dead i feel so broken and worthless please please help me

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