what is it then

i am really loving the results im seeing from this new anti couch patato plan i came up with and ive been sticking to i mean i am really proud it gets easier everyday and im not sore after workouts anymore ive lost 35 pounds and my tummy is finally getting with the program and following suit lol its still there but its smaller dont uncross your finges just yet though i got a ways to go till i reach my goal,

but its more then just the outside im loving the way i feel inside just as much im stronger i have more energy my neck and back pain are almost gone all the way my mind is shaper and my spirit is claim

i miss pat still but im ok and im more acepting of the truth about pat and my life with him. yes it hurts no i didnt wake up one morning and suddenly hate him or forget him he is very much fresh in my mind i dream about him every night i wake up looking for him every morning but then i morn him and all i lost when i lost him and after a bit i am able to pick myself up and carry on with my day its… better not healed or over but better

with out a doubt or 2nd guess i am thankful for being enlightened on the whole narcissist clan i think i speak for more then myself when i say ” i really thought i was going crazy” ” i thought i was the one who was bad wrong and who fucked up ” but i wasnt not fully and nether were you, yes everyone has a part but we must share blame and place it fairly

dont take too much dont give too much find a balance

i have a lot going on right now as far as self work i am buried under great topic in school and im pushing through sticking to each dream and i trying to trust and let go

its hard and it fucking sucks it hits me at night when everyone and the sun go away and im left alone well i have my furry paw gang but im used to having him even when he was mean to me he was here i wasnt alone though it felt like it oh man see it dont make sence and it sounds so dumb trust me i know hi yea its me tina welcome to ..my blog … my damned life blog

i dont if its that i miss him cause i cant pick out something i miss exactly i mean id bet that if he were here right now we would be fighting or not talking or hed be at james house ,,,,

what is it i miss? i miss my life before him before fulton before i found my heart and before it was shattered and destroyed

yea thats it i wish i could go back to 2013 and i wish i never met pat i wish i didnt even know that fulton was a town hidden inside my town…

star light star bright maybe youll grant my wish some night….

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